BECOMING: Ignite Courage

If you dare to dream and plan big enough to step into your full potential, there are going to be many times where you don't feel safe, or in control.  

Here's a secret: Safety and control are only thoughts.  If you've ever been laid off from a job unexpectedly, you know what I mean.  One day, you know where your next check is coming from, and you know what you need to work on for the week.  Then BOOM! New information is presented (Surprise, your position has been eliminated!) and that comfort zone is shattered. 

Your brain will go immediately to finding a new comfort zone.  Will it be the couch & Netflix? A group of friends who will listen to your story and agree on how badly you've been treated? Food? Drink? Shopping? (If used to buffer the fear and the feeling, these can be destructive). Absorbing attention in these vices is comfortable because it allows you to buffer the discomfort, fear, and pain.  How long will you stay there?  I know one thing: it won't pay the bills, make you healthier, and it won't create real safety and control.  It won't enrich your relationships. It will not spark joy. 

If comfort is a state of mind, then could it be true that the FEAR zone is also a state of mind?  

Of course!  Fear is the anticipation of an undesirable outcome.  Mark Twain once said, "I've endured a lot of hardship in my life, most of which never actually happened."  Can you relate?

BECOMING the kind of person it takes to reach your goals means igniting the courage to step outside your COMFORT zone and break through the FEAR zone.  Make no mistake, you must go through the fear.  Fear will surround you - it's not weakness. It's just a thought.  

How To Ignite Courage

First, you must remember that "courage" is not the absence of fear. 

Mark Twain said, "Courage is not the absence of fear; it is acting in spite of it." 

Franklin D Roosevelt said, "Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear."

Nelson Mandela said, "I learned that courage was not the absence of fear, but the triumph over it. The brave man is not he who does not feel afraid, but he who conquers that fear."

These quotes give three ways to Ignite Courage.  

Acknowledge the fear. 

Fear is your mind's way of alerting you to possible danger.  Stop for a moment and discern whether it's real or imagined. Weigh the risk.  You won't grow without taking any risks. 

Fear may disguise itself in other forms: Imposter syndrome, insecurity, anxiety, procrastination, judgment of self or others, labeling a situation as 'bad,' discomfort, etc.  

Get specific - go beyond, fear.  Fear of what?  Is avoiding what you fear more important than your dream?

Give the fear a name.  By doing so, you disassociate it from yourself. It becomes something you can conquer. It becomes just another problem to solve.

Fear can be useful. But only for a moment as an alert signal. Before responding to the fear, understand it. It may be alerting you to a dangerous path. Check it out. Follow it anyway or pick a new path - just don't stop working toward your goal. 

Stop Fighting the Fear.

Fear does not need to be eliminated before you take the next step. Courage is acting anyway. No one said it is acting after the fear is gone.  Courage is neither necessary nor possible without fear. If you want to be courageous, welcome fear!  

You have a choice: Focus on the fear. Or focus on the action, goal, or vision.  Your next right step could be to mitigate the risk that sparked your fear.  Mitigating the risk doesn't mean giving up or avoiding action.

If it is possible to imagine the worst possible outcome, isn't it just as possible to imagine the best possible outcome? Some will tell you this isn't realistic. But if the result didn't yet happen, then the focus on what you fear is equally unrealistic. 

Henry Ford said it this way, "Whether you think you can, or you think you can't, you are right."  You get what you focus on.

Know what is most important.

Fear will show up when you do something you've never done. When it does, greet it! "I knew you'd come!  I can do this! Don't believe me? Just watch!" (Yep, you can even sing with Bruno Mars!)

Courage is ignited when you can see the other side of fear.  

If your fear is keeping you from becoming the best version of yourself, perhaps you haven't connected strongly to your Why.  Maybe you don't believe that you can create and have your heart's desire. Maybe you haven't fully committed to the journey. 

Before you abandon the vision, take the time to discern whether it's because of fear, or because it's just not that important to you. 

Whatever you decide, make sure you like the reason.  Then embrace your choice.  And take the next right step.  

Your Comfort Zone Will Grow

When you ignite courage the walls of your comfort zone expand.  

When you know what you fear, you can take action to tame the fear.  Learn a skill. Find a partner. Practice. Use the Law of Attraction to create confidence.  

The first time you drove a car, you were out of your comfort zone.  You practiced. You learned how to operate the car. You learned the rules of the road.  Now driving a car is so comfortable, you probably don't give it much thought. 

Look at where you are today.  Make a list of all your successes, or things you find "comfortable" today.  You weren't born doing these things.  This is all evidence of your ability to expand your comfort zone when you had your sights on something more important. 

Make another list of the things you do every day, even though it's a little scary.  Parenting? Leading others? Rollercoasters? And you do it anyway, because let's face it: Sometimes scary is also a whole lot of fun.   

Focus on fun over fear!

As you move on to the next element of BECOMING (Negotiate the Cost) you are going to encounter many forms of fear.  

You get to decide: Will I move forward anyway? 

What got you here isn't going to get you to where you want to be.  You may have to let some things go so you can pick up what you really want and what you are growing into. In the next article, we'll dig deeper into Negotiating the Cost.

Subscribe today so you don't miss out on the next essential element to BECOMING:  

B:  Believe in Possibility 

E:  Edit Your Environment

C:  Commit to the Journey

O: Own the Vision

M: Manage the Moments

I:   Ignite Courage

N: Negotiate the Cost

G: Give Gratitude and Grace

Let's chat!  Schedule a complimentary strategy session to build your vision and your reality around BECOMING the kind of person it takes to live your best life.